I am giving away all my furniture tomorrow to a loving home and though I do not know exactly what will happen on my big journey or where I will end up, I know in my heart it is time to leave!
I have a vague desire to visit Texas near Austin though technically I will technically remain a California resident until further notice.
I believe that on a spiritual level, I was called to stay in Los Angeles as part of the 100th monkey effect; to help usher in an awakening in this calcified close-hearted city. Somehow this feels very true in my soul as to why I was here for so much longer than I had hoped.
I know I will return to CoMeDy again but in a different way, completely! And I am EXCITED!
I am so glad I stayed here exactly as long as I did and faced the specific conflicts I did, which I trust were all divinely designed to force me to grow as a person.
I am so grateful for my (almost) 4 year journey here culminating in a plant medicine ceremony which made so many things make sense!
I know that everything in my life has led me exactly where I am now and I couldn't be where I am if it weren't for everything happening to me (for me) exactly as it did!
It sounds so simple but it is mind blowing to think about - that literally everything you did - every thing down to the last second has all added up to make you meet exactly who you have, and travelled exactly where you did. ISN'T THAT SO AMAZING? Even the smallest things, like leaving for a trip an hour later because of your terrible diarrhea has led you to this moment, and all the various things that came along just in time.... HOW BEAUTIFUL
What conflicts have you experienced where you look back and realize you learned something valuable as an outcome happened directly because of that conflict?
PS I have been compiling things I find influential on my Tumblr, Earthtocarlen.tumblr.com if you want to check it out!
I decided to catalogue all the documentaries/articles I have found inspiring there (and not using Instagram or Facebook to share things, especially since my page has been shadowbanned and literally the only things I am interested in besides moth photos, are censored/controversial topics - since to me, they are the most important issues for humanity right now!)
I literally feel like social media is haunted with a bad frequency intended to keep people afraid, no matter what they look at!
I also am still repulsed by looking at screens in general, which is partially why I haven;t been writing as much as usual : )
Plus, I do not want the screen to dictate what I believe is happening or what I believe is possible and make me feel pessimistic as if there is a structured parameter around possible outcomes/timelines for humanity/my idea of life in general!
Rather than accepting reality based on what we see "out there" (by looking out there for proof of a reality's possibility) ::::
Let's pray for exactly what it is we want for ourselves and humanity and stretch our idea of what is possible.
I see everyone in Venus Project - style architecture with enough food and water and warmth and shelter and safety and love and health using all kinds of new technologies, where we are all befriending animals and plants and people who look differently and similarly, of all races and ages (LIKE A CHEESY PEPSI COMMERCIAL, MINUS THE PEPSI) - lots of hugging and crying and movement and sounds - people who make direct eye contact and everyone dancing and laughing and making art and doing exactly what we want to do. All the evil being exposed, forgiven and healed. We have the technology to do this. Let's see it in our minds and expect it is on it's way.
"WHY NOT WIN IN YOUR IMAGINATION?"
Would we get bored with Utopia???
Until we can heal the subconscious need for conflict as a way to feel safe ( which has been ingrained into us since birth ) we will manifest conflict.
We must relearn that it is safe to be bored (and boring/still) and that life can be easy and pleasurable and that it is safe to feel everything.
I now want to be bored and trusting and enjoy life as it is while making fun helpful things.
Drama and conflict are overrated despite getting 99% of the attention in our entertainment.
Imagine a show with no conflict? Would you watch it?
