I am impressed at how much I have to write now that I have taken the lid of self-repression off myself.

I wonder if you are imagining me like the main character from The Shining just writing and writing away on a typewriter, with a concerned wife behind me, an an opulent spooky hotel, snowed-in and overlooking a snowy scene of trees...

(A wife, coincidentally played by a talented sensitive actress, who has become a recluse in rural Texas, and clearly has a lot of unresolved trauma and "paranoia" which is publically being branded as "mental illness", which I gather, is partially-induced from acting in the traumatizng movie which is The Shining). My parents showed me The Shining when I was 4 so I have very strong associations and opinions about this film. (Adding that to the proverbial CPTSD rolodex of traumatic experiences in my life, haha)

ANYWAY, the point is, if you are reading along as I write, I commend you for following along! 

It feels like I am on a psychological rollercoaster that is at times exhilirating and nauseating so I thank you for sitting with me. BARF!

Yesterday I sat in the park, after climbing way off the main path and high into the trees, and took my shirt off to feel the sun on me and listened to one terrible amazing rap song over and over again, dancing, while simultaneously reading the Kindle version of "Children of Emotionally Immature Parents" and I was laughing at life and the way I navigate it, a foot away from poison oak trees, and a mile away from multi million dollar mansions and the insanity of society, and the fact that nobody had any idea where I was (except you, now - and the NSA most likely, hahaha - there is a fine line between paranoia and fact in a post-Wikileaks world).

Last July, I ate plant medicine and meditated and asked "What is really going on in this pandemic?" since none of it clearly makes any logical sense for a virus with over 99% survival, and I closed my eyes and I am not exaggerating when I say that I began automatic writing an entire book, which was not from Me, but was channelled from some external force, which I now see as my spiritual guides, which I believe are likely Pleiadian, based on everything I have read. 

Automatic writing has now happened to me 4 times and it is such an incredible feeling because it is like my right hand is being pulled to write, without any force, and without any thought. 

It is a different handwriting than my own and I can do it with my eyes mostly closed. It literally feels like someone is moving my hand for me, and the feeling of having my hand being moved feels so incredible and in a way, orgasmic, and it is just one of the most fascinating things I have ever experienced.

The first time that happened was in December 2018 when I was snowed in a cabin in an area called Angelus Oaks, California (where I was visiting a geodesic home which was for sale, and the real estate agent let me stay in a local house to test how I liked the area). 

It was funny because I literally got snowed in to that cabin with only 2 days worth of food and was there for 6 days until the snow was cleared from the main road, and so I had to become very inventive with my food to survive. 

One of the neighbors in the area brought me frozen green beans she had and I mixed it with cashew cheese and water into a big soup and it was one of the most delicious things I have ever had, especially considering how hungry I was. 

Needless to say, I did not move to that area after all - though it is funny to imagine that the real estate agent was trying to set up the ideal situation for a potential buyer, and here I am, snowed in with no food, burning newspaper in the fireplace to stay warm. Ha ha ha! What a great infommercial for Angelus Oaks, California. Honestly, I loved the entire week and I am really glad it happened to me.

It is truly a beautiful area so visit if you can (though not in the winter or summer, haha)

It was that week that I received an entire comedy routine through me, which was honestly really funny to me and some of which I have incorporated into this blog, but, as you can tell, I was not ready to share it with the world. 

"WE GOTTA BEAUTIFUL CROWD, TONIGHT, PEOPLE" - me doing standup comedy facing a wall in a snowed in cabin.

The second time I channelled material was when I watched the movie Soylent Green in 2019 (which I was loudly told to watch, by my inner voice) and then I took plant medicine and did automatic writing for about an hour, all about the true intentions of Genetically Modified Foods as it relates to what I am told is an "antilife agenda". 

The views which came through me are not the same as those presented in Soylent Green, though I highly recommend that movie.

The most recent time I experienced automatic writing was last July when I 'wrote' an entire book, all about Oxygen, vaccines, and shifting timelines. 

This book was the most shocking of all the information I received so I initially hid this book from everyone except for 4 close friends and my doctor.

My doctor organized an in-person meeting with 8 of his patients last August - as he suggested we all meet to discuss "the state of the world" and I read everyone most of the channelled book to my doctor and his patents and they were all very receptive/listening and it was a very surreal experience; especially considering we were all in a suburban cookie cutter-looking house in a row of identical houses in the middle of the desert and everyone was Chinese/Chinese American except for me and one other person - a doctor in his 50's who connects his pateitns to 'their ideal trees' using tree essences and kinesiology (I still have not gone to him, but I want to!) -, which made me so grateful to be with people of different backgrounds, all united by their commitment to health and the truth and "BeInG a WeIrDo". (my inner critic)

It was at this meeting that I met one of my now-very close friends Cindy, who has since moved back to Taiwan. She is now working for a famous energy healer and tomorrow they are doing a remote Chakra re-alignment on me, which I have never done, but am very excited.   

She and I drove to Sedona, Arizona last year and it was amazing because I did not get tired the whole time spending time with her. 

Her energy did not drain me and it was so eye-opening to me that I can be with people and not get drained!!!!! She commented the same thing - as she too is someone who is sensitive to other people's energy, and it was so nice to finally meet a truly likeminded friend here in Los Angeles.

Back to the channelling thing.The crazy thing is that I have found people on Instagram who consider themselves "channellers" and they have received very similar concepts as I have received, all about the timeline split of Earth. 

Because of my self-consciousness of "being crazy", I still have yet to "come out of the closet" as someone who receives messages - and I do not want to brand myself as a "psychic" or "channeller" right now, since I am not ready for that kind of public attention - though when I spoke to my ex-boyfriend a few months ago about it all, he suggested I call myself the Standup Co(s)mic or Cosmic Comedian, something else witty/punny, but this feels hoaky and kitchy in a sort of 1970's public-access-y vibe.

Not everything that I have been told is "funny" ; a lot of it is actually very concerning and relates to the depopulation, especially of minorities and their connection to Earth and Oxygen. In other words, much of the channelled information is not very "Instagram friendly", especially in light of cancel culture, especially for someone who is now healing CPTSD.

I sent my book to one of my best friends Davonte, who is black and concerned with all the things I am (who I once referenced a few months ago) and he agreed with everything I wrote, which was really comforting, to not be seen as crazy, but appreciated for my work.

I WONDER IF MISS CLEO WAS CHANNELLING PLEIADIANS TOO?!?! HAHA

Just kidding.

See that's the thing, even I am still skeptical of anything "channelled" or "psychic" or of that nature, because of the societal programming to equate psychics with late-night-TV infommercials like Ms. Cleo.

This is ANOTHER REASON why I do not want to publically share my channelling experiences yet - though in a way, that is mostly what this blog has been, a combination of my own beliefs and the beliefs shared to me in my ear, from my Higher self / unseen forces which are perhaps Pleiadian. (Who knows!)

I know this is why my "Guides" want me to move into nature; so I can have less frequencies and interruptions from a clear connection with them instead.

CAN YOU IMAGINE SAYING ALL THIS OUTLOUD TO A "NORMAL PERSON"?

But again, what is normal anyway?

As I mentioned months ago, 3 of the people I respect most - the founder of Human Design ; the founder of MedicalMedium.com; and Rudolf Steiner - are all openly receiving and sharing useful channelled material. 

It makes sense to me, in a way, that I should be given these abilities as well, since I am clearly open to them.

I am HONORED AND GRATEFUL to receive messages. 

I feel anxiety even acknowledging all this because of my fear of being bullied or harmed for being 'crazy'.

Thank you for having an open mind as you read this .

I am grateful to have learned psychic protection techniques as well, so I can be protected. 

What a unique direction my life has gone in! Imagine if I was just a normal actress on some forgettable libidinous HBO tv show? Haha

I think had I not gotten so sick and been so lost, looking for answers, I would have more of a closed mind, literally and figuratively. 

If Western medicine had helped me, I would never be open to/desperate enough to be open to all of the "woo woo" things that have finally helped me...

And I would not have been open-minded towards myself and now labeling myself as gifted instead of "crazy"

In a way, it is such a blessing that I got as sick as I did because it forced me to be open-minded enough to try alternative things, and in the process, accept that I am different from most people and maybe you are too! 

I am sure you are.

As another fellow CrAzY person, Anthony William, or MedicalMedium has said...

"
“All that time that symptoms were limiting you, they were giving you something, too.

That compassion you gained from being vulnerable, that wisdom that came from watching life at a distance, that faith that there had to be an answer, that supreme patience of putting one foot in front of the other—these are yours to use for the rest of your life.

Losses, struggles, wounds, suffering, pain, sorrow, fear, hardships, trials, letdowns, & battles are not what any of us would choose.

When they visit us, though, we get our greatest tools & treasures.

Those tools & treasures can be heavy.

To be in touch with the world’s suffering is not easy.

Just like a bag of diamonds & gold, it can weigh you down.

Which is why it’s time for you to come into the spiritual significance of your challenges—because when you attach spiritual meaning to your treasures, it makes them light as light itself.

You’ve been picked out of the crowd as a special person who can change the world.

Because you hold power, illness tried to hold you back.

You probably experienced symptoms along the way, & this may have gotten you labeled with a whole bunch of different names for what was supposedly wrong with you.

Yet the plan of you being picked on backfired.

Instead of being constrained, you were pushed forward & forced to grow & develop in your soul & spirit.

You gained understandings & insights that brought you closer to God.

Now you get to rid yourself of your illness & all those symptoms & labels that have come with it.

You get to heal, rise above, & reclaim your power—power that’s more than you know.

As you bring your body back to health, you’ll be supporting it even more in taking care of your soul’s wealth—wealth you will use to spread divine light to everyone around you.”"