I was invited to Florida with one of the founders of VICE and I really don't want to go because we have no mental or physical connection. We barely did in 2015 but I convinced myself we did because I was in a very vulnerable place, pitching a show to them, and also with my dad dying and mother ignoring my needs. I needed a strong rich man to step in and save me then. Not anymore. Life is so weird. I am afraid to tell him no. Why? This is the New Paradigm of "I can rely on myself, God and Earth" instead of the Old Paradigm "I must rely on people I do not connect with to survive"

I have crafted a message to him.

Saying no to invitations

https://www.self.com/story/saying-no-to-invitations

“Oh, thank you so much for thinking of me! Unfortunately I won’t be able to make it, but thank you for the invitation!”

“I don’t really have the bandwidth for much socializing right now, but I would love to [do something else][in a couple days/weeks/months when you’d be up for it].”

Thank you so much for thinking of me for a special adventure. I am very grateful for your sweet invitation and I am sure we would have a nice time in the sunshine eating delicious burgers with lightly black-peppered tomato slices driving around in the dream car looking into each others twinkle eyes, HOWEVER the ...

2ND TAKE...


This is vulnerable for me to share _(insert name here)_ but the more I think about traveling to Florida and visiting you, as much as I know we would have a fun time, I honestly don’t really have the emotional bandwidth right now for the type of cheerful quasi-platonic-romantic-professional dynamic right now like we had in 2016. I have changed a lot and I want to always be transparent with people I care about like you ❤️ It just doesn’t feel authentic to casually travel that far right now, especially in the pandemic.

I value our friendship so feel free to call me if you want to talk more about this.

When I do decide to make it to Florida to visit my dad’s family in St Augustine one day (either this year or next), I would love to have lunch with you if you’re up for it!👩🏻‍🌾

Thank you for hearing my honest perspective with an open heart.